March 21, 2024. I’ve got a call from my sister about her biopsy report. It is confirmed. “Mom has breast cancer”. I was in shock. This is a 57-year-old woman, perfectly healthy, but somehow, got diagnosed with breast cancer. That result was a giant sledgehammer to my reality. I just got promoted to my first managerial position, filled with problems when suddenly, this is something bigger than I could ever imagine. 

There was a lot of fear going into this, but the doctors and nurses took my mom and my family by the hand and made sure that we understood what is the process that their going to take. They’re going to take her for surgery. And they’ll schedule it for us to make sure we get the earliest possible date.

Meanwhile, for myself, I was in shambles. I was already late for work,  I was crying on the way to work. And when I got there I cried in my office, struggling to get my shit together. My boss came to my office and asked me what was going on. I told him the full story and he said he’s sorry for what happened. He told me that to take however much time you need in your office. It took me a good half an hour for me to be somewhat functional. When I got to the kitchen, lunch service was halfway finished. So I just helped out in the dish station to support my team without breaking down. 

After service, my team asked me what happened. Because this is the first time that I came to work late, stayed in my office while lunch service started, and just stayed at the back, without proper leadership. I could just not tell them and say that I was sick, but I’m not a liar and I can’t lie in front of my team. That’s not how I operate. So I told them the full story. Everything. I broke down in front of them. My baker, who is one of my closest co-workers, picked me up and hugged me. They all said that I have their full support and if I need to take time off to take care of her, so be it. One of my coworkers who was a stage 2 breast cancer survivor gave me a day-to-day rundown of what to expect. A close cook of mine gave me advice on how to comfort my mom and what I could do to make her feel safe and healthy during her recovery process. And all the younger cooks promised that they’d call me on my day off to see how my mom and I were doing. They even gave me cooking channels on YouTube for my mom and me to watch while she’s in recovery. Cooking has always been our common ground because we always love cooking for each other. It was a lot to take in. I feel sadness, grievances, anxiety, depression, but a bit of hope.

We got the call that the scheduled surgery is two weeks from now, which is surprisingly fast. Typically, it takes 1–3 months to book, but we’re so fortunate to have it booked so soon. Thank God for that. Even our family doctor was shocked that we got it so early. 

Fast forward 2 weeks, it was the longest 8 hours of my life. From being in the waiting room to waiting for the surgery to be finished. When it was finished, the doctor said that she was very high on anesthesia and her blood sugar was unstable and needed to be monitored. The family takes turns taking care of her over 4 weeks. The first 48 hours were the most difficult. I remembered very clearly how drunk she was on anesthesia. She was scared, confused, and hungry. But unable to eat because food and anesthesia don’t mix well. It was just water, juice, and maybe a bit of congee. The first night, I was sleeping in the same room as her to monitor the situation. A few times, she and I ran to the bathroom toilet and she began throwing up because of the anesthesia. She was in so much pain. I put my hand on her back, my head on her shoulder, and just broke down. It was the most traumatic experience I had in my life. I remembered telling myself “If we’re ever going to make this out in one piece, I’ll be living a different life. A better life.”

It slowly gets better day by day. My family went to their online fellowship committee for some strength and guidance. I’m trying to pick up my pieces while trying to do the best I can at work, and my team keeps me in check. What I can say is that the nurses and doctors are very supportive, and they really care about my mom and everyone in the family. I am truly grateful for that. 

The recovery process was about 5-6 weeks. The nurses checked up on her every 3-4 days to see if she was doing well, if the stitches were still in place and monitor the wounded area where the doctor did the surgery. At week 6, the stitches were removed and she’s able to do basic exercises. 

After 2 weeks the doctors did one more biopsy test to see if the cancer treatment was successful, or she had to undergo more treatment. The doctor came into the room and told my family that the surgery was a huge success and the cancer cells didn’t spread. She is now cancer-free. Everyone was overwhelmed with joy. I’ve told my team and they’re so happy to hear the great news. After another 2 weeks, my mom was able to do her regular activities again

The one thing that I’ll say to anyone who is suffering this issue is to speak up. During this time, my family and I could’ve held this bad news inside. But in reality, it will make the situation much worse. People are going through the same thing or might go down the same path as you did. You’ll be astonished at how much people care about you and your loved ones.